8 week challenge

FIRST. I ran 10 miles on Sunday.

It was awesome...

EVERYTHING IS AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Lego movie humor...get with it.

ALSO...My phone is DYING a slow, painful death thanks to my profuse sweating...SEE ABOVE PICTURE. A genius runner friend of mine gave me the idea of using breast milk storage bags. BOOM. Genius. Stayed nice and dry. 

Quick post today because I'm going to spin class at 5:45 tomorrow morning............................................. UGHHHHHHH I hate mornings. But I feel like a BEAST the rest of the day...or untill 4:00 when I lock myself in my son's bedroom WITH THE KIDS...don't freak out mom...and take a little siesta while they play trains. Win win. 

I just started an 8 week challenge with one of my favorite bloggers Mama Laughlin... I relate a lot to her story so go check her out. 

Another great blogger that I get a lot of inspiration from is Skinny Meg. She just had her second babe, is breastfeeding, and working on cleaning up her eating post pregnancy. She posts lots of great, EASY recipes. 

Anyways......8 week challenge...I'm doing things slightly different than Mama Laughlin is because I DO WHAT I WANT. And because I'm training for running long distances NOT a bikini competition. 

Basically I'm committing to taking the next 8 weeks to REALLY get my nutrition together. I can't expect my body to go through a week like this on oreos, chocolate milk, and chocolate covered strawberries. Obviously I have a love for chocolate.

A typical week looks like this:

Sunday: Run 10 miles.

Monday: Rest

Tuesday: Bootcamp.

Wednesday: Run 4 miles.

Thrusday: Run 5 miles.

Friday: Run or bootcamp...depending on the middle child and his hatred for all babysitters.

Saturday: Dream about running.

Sunday: Run 10 miles.

Repeat...But keep adding miles to that long run. 

To be totally honest I've been pretty lax with my food choices for a few reasons.

1. I love food.

2. I know with how active I am not going to gain weight...but really...running on a belly full of junk feels like crap.

3. I love food.

So here's my challenge to you:
Commit to changing something in your life you've been struggling with for the next 8 weeks. It doesn't have to be drastic like stop drinking coffee. HA. Someone would die if I attempted that. But just find something that you know needs improvement and commit to changing it for 2 short months.

SUMMER IS COMING!! SUN'S OUT GUNS OUT BABY!!! That's what I say to myself when I don't want to do anymore push ups. Because I'm cool like that.

I'm 2 days into this challenge and I've ate CONSIDERABLY better for the past 2 days and already noticed a difference in my workout this morning.

My goals are: eating more protein, more vegetables, always eating breakfast, drinking more water, NOT eating large amounts of chocolate every.single.day.

NOTICE I'm not cutting anything out of my diet because....I LOVE FOOD...but just really cleaning it up and making better choices, focusing on fueling my body, and NOT going to the pantry and eating a whole sleeve of graham crackers.

I took my measurements, before pictures, and have a friend doing it with me to keep me accountable. Oh and my entire life is out there for all to see so that keeps me accountable too..................................

Each week I'll update you all on how I'm doing! The good, the bad, and the ugly.

8 weeks from now...school will be ending, summer will be just around the corner...cookouts, lazy days in the sunshine, endless hours chasing my crazy babes at the park, and the start of my FAVORITE TIME OF YEAR to run ridiculous amounts of miles.....This is the perfect time for me to give my body a little kick in the ass.

What I challenge you to do.........................is join me! Find something you have wanted to change and DO IT! Run a little farther, knock out a bad habit, eat one less cookie...whatever it is. 8 weeks from now you will be glad you did...and chances are you won't look back.

Left: Summer 2013

Right: Spring 2014

JUST KEEP GOING.

Boom Goes the Dynamite.

It's suppose to be spring.

So I'm suppose to be running 8-10 mile long runs on the weekends.

The farthest I've ran since my half last September is 6 miles. In the snow. Up hill both ways.

Which I'm totally fine with because after the running season ended last fall I knew through the winter I just wanted to maintain my running and work on getting stronger. But what really happened is we had a shit storm of a winter and my running was minimal....and with all the horrible snow storms, ice, and snow days with the kids home I couldn't get in a good routine of going to spinning, or to any sort of place to workout. So I've been waiting incredibly impatiently for this weather to break so I could get back into a regular schedule.

Can you say Type A Personality.

As each weekend passed where I was suppose to be running 7 or 8 mile long runs and instead I'm trudging through 6 inches of snow and struggling to run 6 miles and coming home and crashing on the couch for the rest of the day because running through snow is like running through sand.

Though there were TWO days last week that were absolutely amazing. One of those days I took this little Gremlin out for our first run since last fall and it was so much fun. He's waiving like a crazy at every passing semi truck and chattering constantly.  I don't like running without music because as a friend of mine says...."I don't want to hear myself suffocating." But with him I usually only put one ear bud in so I can hear his constant chatter about trucks and birds and anything else that crosses his little squirrel mind.


So Friday I woke up and it was another B-E-A-utiful day. 45 degrees. Bright shining sunlight. The exact kind of day I'd been waiting for. I knew it was time. I knew I had to push past this six mile wall I had built myself.

NOTE: I had this exact.same.problem getting to mile 1 a year ago AND AGAIN getting past mile 3 when training for my half marathon. Exact.same.problem...........more on this later.

So out I went to run my first 8 miler since last fall when I was training for my first half marathon. I was running this while my hubs was home with this kids during his lunch break so I had EXACTLY enough time to run 8 miles and average a 10 minute mile.

For reasons outside of my control...think............THANK THE GOOD LORD there's a gas station at mile 3 on my route..................................................................................I had to cut my run short to make it back in time for my hubs to be able to get back to work. But this was still the FARTHEST I've ran since last fall and it felt good....but it wasn't the 8 miles that I so badly needed to see. I was proud of myself for sure but I needed to run 8 miles.


Now I want to talk for just a minute about why this 8 miles was so important. Remember all the times I've talked about pushing yourself out of your comfort zone....how that's where greatness happens...How when you conquer something you didn't think you could it's not just about becoming physically stronger but MENTALLY bulletproof...................yeah, all those warm fuzzies I talk about.....It has been MONTHS since I've been able to do something like that. I've been living very comfortably with my 3-4 mile short runs and 5-6 mile long runs for the past 5 months...aka..................THE WORST WINTER IN MICHIGAN HISTORY. So this 8 miles was me finally being able to mentally push myself to the next step in my training.

This wall I had built was 110% mental.

Just like it was when I wanted to run 1 mile.

Just like it was when I wanted to run past 3 miles.



Friday night I went to bed with a plan (TYPE A...ahhhhhem...type A.............) Saturday I was going to go to bootcamp...aka...the best total body workout I've ever had... and Sunday I was going to wake up and run 8 miles before going to church.

Ok. Let's do this.

Saturday boot camp. Check.

Saturday date day with the hubs. Check.

Saturday date night to a St. Patty's Party. Check.


Home by 10:00 with ice on my arches, hot tea with lemon, and no pants. Check.

Sorry.................no picture for this one.

I treated this run like it was a race day. I laid out the exact clothes I was going to wear. I set my alarm and checked that it was set 58 times. I could feel that anticipation, fear, excitement mix in my gut that goes with a big race. I knew I had to get at least 7 hours of sleep. I knew I had to eat and drink coffee an hour before I planned on running. I had my shit together. I was ready. And in true night before a race form................I slept like crap. 2 children slept in our bed. My St. Patty's Party going husband came home like a heard of stampeding buffalo. I woke up at 5 a.m. thinking I missed my alarm. Then again at 5:30. And again at 6:00.................................................Typical night before a race behavior minus the stampeding husband.

The day before I had checked the weather and knew it was going to be COLD.

And by cold I mean 6 freaking degrees.

6.



A friend had planned to run the first 5 miles with me but very wisely decided against it. But there was NO WAY I could not go. NO WAY. This was a really big deal to me. A big wall I NEEDED to get past.

I had a few things working against me before I even had my shoes on....and by a few I mean a lot....The 4 year old and 2 year old woke up with me at 6:30 so I had to make them breakfast and get them settled...Then the 2 year old needed some extra snuggles because he's the middle child and that's how he rolls.......So I sat down to snuggle him and eat my breakfast and drink my coffee and he snuggles in with his blankey and warm little body and that 6 degree frozen hell I was going to be in for 90 minutes was looking less and less appealing. Then the stampeding husband stumbles down the steps and assures me he has it all under controll and I should get ready.

I still didn't know my friend that was going to run with me had decided not to because we have SPRINT for our cell phones and usually about once a month we have NO FREAKING SERVICE FOR TWO ENTIRE DAYS because "They're bettering the service in our area."

You're idiots.

Anyways..........................It's a good thing I didn't know she wasn't coming because I really think I would have stayed snuggled on that couch with that warm little babe then been disappointed in myself the rest of the day. Not to mention the coffee did it's job by 8:10....We had planned on leaving at 8:00...I figured out she wasn't coming at 8:16. Really...It worked out perfectly.

I got dressed. Laced my shoes. Set my watch. And out the door I went.

The first song on my playlist is "Let it Go" from the movie Frozen. It's been my jam all winter.

And at the 1/2 mile mark I was just that...frozen. So I had to do some crafty adjusting to my scarf and wrap it around my head so it covered my face and ears. Then I was golden. Or less frozen at least.

Then...I just ran.

It didn't matter that I had frost forming on my eyelashes, shoulders, shins, and the scarf that was keeping me somewhat warm.


It didn't matter that I ran past my house 3 times and could have quite at mile 5, 6, and 7.

I stopped to take a picture of this beautiful sunrise.



I cried 3 times along the way.

And I just. Kept. Going.

It was my absolute favorite run I have ever been on. And not a single reason why has anything to do with my time, pace, or distance. It's because I FINALLY conquered something that I've been physically able to do for months but mentally just couldn't push myself to overcome.

Now there were some serious physical accomplishments like running the same route I did the last time I ran 8 miles and cutting over a minute per mile off my time....................running mile 8 under 10 minutes..................oh and running 8 FREAKING MILES.



The most important part of this entire LONG post is: It doesn't matter if you're going for one mile, 8 miles, 13.1 miles, or 26.2 miles. You are SO MUCH STRONGER than you think you are. This is a battle I have fought throughout the past year and I will continue to build huge walls that I have to get over or just blow up entirely.........which is exactly what I mean whenever I say............................

BOOM GOES THE DYNAMITE!!!!

Left: Post baby number 3

Right: Post baby number 1 (man that little baby is CUTE!)

Don't ever give up.

Just.Keep.Going.

Patience is NOT a virtue of mine.

Impatient.

Is my middle name.

Patience.....Is definitely NOT a virtue of mine...and as a runner this winter has tested every ounce of patience I have....which I think is a total of .00056 ounces......is that even an amount of ounces? Good thing I'm certified to educate the youth of this country...................................

So as I sit here on SNOW DAY NUMBER 42,968 I am having a mini freak out...And since I've been completely honest with everything I've ever posted here I'll share my exact thoughts.

1. Should  I lose more weight? I mean the scale has been stuck between 163 and 165 for 2 months...............Do people look at me and think I should be smaller?

2. How the hell am I going to run 15.5 miles in 2 months? Thanks to this shit storm of a winter my long runs are only 6 miles....I should be around 10 miles right now.

3. WHY THE HELL did I eat virtually NOTHING all weekend and drink ALL THE FREAKING BEER?

So what do you do when you're having a mini freak out? Call your best running friend and have her talk you off your cliff.  After a 20 minute conversation with said friend AND some reflection on my part I've figured out the answers to my freak out questions. Here you go...

1. Should I lose more weight: WHO THE EFF CARES?!? I had to remind myself how far my body has come and like I've always said...THIS IS NOT ABOUT THE SCALE but about how my quality of life has changed...I have an incredible amount of self worth that I've never had before. The scale going down is a side effect of all the badassery I'm completing on a daily basis...the badassery is my focus...not the scale.

 


2. How the hell am I going to run 15.5 miles in 2 months. I'm going to put one foot in front of the other and Just.Keep.Going because there is no feeling better than crossing that finish line. I haven't been running very much but I forget what I HAVE been doing....spinning, bootcamps, swimming, at home body weight workouts...and when I really think about it I am already much more ready for this 25k than I was for my first 1/2 marathon. I'm stronger, faster, and (even though I'm mid freak out) mentally tougher.


3. WHY THE HELL did I eat virtually NOTHING all weekend and drink ALL THE FREAKING BEER? Because there's not many times in my life where I'm in our home town with both sets of grandparents to watch the kids AND it's during the weekend of a Celtic Pub Crawl. So yeah....I should drink all the beer....But I should have ate food...................................Rookie mistake.


I also managed a 9:30/min mile 5k that morning on nothing more than a donut and half a cup of coffee.


So there you go....I'm not perfect...I freak out about things that I KNOW are completely crazy...but apparently when you're stuck in your house for the millionth time this winter the voices start talking.......................................................Usually when I start to doubt myself I go for a run and challenge myself to do something I didn't think I could then I come back and feel bullet proof all over again. Today I'm going to do the next best thing and go shovel the 8 inches of new snow that resides in our gigantic driveway. This is where the patience comes in. It's going to be sunny and 45 on Friday...........................must.survive.till.friday.

Left: 3 weeks before baby number 2 was born

Right: 3 days after drinking ALL THE BEER

Just.Keep.Going

This Awful, Beautiful Life

Today while I was folding a mountain of laundry that had consumed our entire dining room floor and table I was thinking about this stage of life we are in right now.

If life would have followed the path we had chosen for ourselves we wouldn't have ANY children yet, I would be teaching full time, we would have paid off all of my student loans, bought our dream house, traveled the country, and POSSIBLY considered starting a family in the next year or two. 

But there I stood folding Superman underwear, listening to our 2 year old make uncannily accurate sound effects while loading the playdough rocks into his dump truck.  Our one year old was edging his way on tip toes around the kitchen table where all the folded laundry sat like a shark circling his prey, and our 4 year old was in charge of the background music and was doing and excellent job of switching between the classic sounds of Mario Brothers, Mario Cart, and Batman....

Some days this stage of life makes me want to stick hot pokers in my eyes.................But today I loved every, single, second. 

Maybe it was the fact that both Friday night and this morning we had friends over and were able to actually sit and have conversations rather than playing referee all.freaking.night. 

Maybe it's because I had 2 AWESOME runs this weekend.

Maybe it's because the temperature was actually above zero for the first time in MONTHS....and by above zero I mean 5 degrees. 

But I stood their folding laundry, just soaking in these little boys and their sweetness.  The simplicity of their lives. The innocence in their thoughts. Max and his curiosity with his rocks and how intricately his was making piles just to smash them down.  Tyler's determination to pull every piece of clothing off the table he could get his chubby little hands on. Zack's intense competitiveness and drive to constantly be better at such an early age.

This stage of life is not easy. 

Taking 3 kids under 5 grocery shopping takes LOTS of mental preparation.

There are mornings where it's not even 8:00 a.m. and I've had to break up an all out fist fight over who gets the Spiderman place mat and who gets the Thomas place mat. 

I have heard the words, "Sorry mom, I touched my poop." and "I don't want to drink my pee today." 

I have said the words, "Don't put the dog food in your nose!" and "Don't drink the bath water your brother peed in the tub 5 minutes ago." 

I yell. 

I cry.

On nights I realize I forgot to wash the peed on sheets RIGHT as I'm putting them in bed I throw down a towel rather than changing the bedding and risking waking up the sleeping baby.

They watch T.V....and by watch I mean can recite 90% of the Toy Story movies and 97% of Wreck it Ralph. 

I don't generally wear jeans and when I do Max will ask, "Do you have meeting mommy?"

At any given moment you could walk in our house and see one or more children in the bathtub.  Whether it's because we had spaghetti for lunch and my children eat like cavemen or we endured another poop touching episode...................the bathtub is my saving grace. 

Yes, my house is cleaned by someone else every other week.

Yes, my husband had awesome hours and works 2 blocks from our front door.

Yes, said husband also does more in a day for me and our kids than most husbands do in a month.

Yes, our children are in bed by 8:00 every night so I'm usually sitting down with a cup of hot tea, no pants, and browsing facebook no later than 8:07. 

Some days I just need to step back and see just how beautiful our life really is. And that is exactly what I did today mid laundry mountain. 

I've been given a lot of parenting advice since the first time I saw two pink lines but my all time favorite words of wisdom are, "How you speak to your children become their inner voice." So today my Monday Motivation does not revolve around changing your body....but focusing on what you want your little's one's to hear inside their heads and hearts when you're not there to say it. What does their inner voice sound like? 

I am not supermom. I am not perfect. I will be the first one to admit when I'm wrong...Ok, maybe the second.  But I do know I only get one shot at giving my babes the morals and values they need before sending them out into the world. There's only 940 Saturdays from the time your child is born until their 18th birthday...................

I do have an easy life.......

I take naps in the sun.

I make playdough rocks, lego cities, and awesome blanket forts

I let them pull the folded laundry off the table just to hear the one year old laugh from the bottom of his toes. 

Don't confuse an easy life with a beautiful life. 

One of my favorite country songs says it best.................................

I laid in bed that night and thought about the day

And how my life is like a roller coaster ride
The ups and downs and crazy turns along the way
It'll throw you off if you don't hold on tight
You can't really smile until you've shed some tears
I could die today or I might live on for years

I love this crazy, tragic,
Sometimes almost magic,
Awful, beautful life

Monday Motivation.

It's been awhile...

Since my children are playing nicely...I MUST write about what I've been doing because the world cares oh so much..............................................................

This winter has sucked. I read yesterday that after our snow last week, Michigan has accumulated over 70 inches of snow this year. BLAH.

Not to mention the INSANE cold we've had....-20 and -30 windchills for 3 or 4 days in a row.... TWICE!

I've kept running but cut down A LOT...I was running between 12 and 15 miles a week...Now I'm between 6 and 9 miles a week. BLAH.

The only way I can describe this to non runners (like my husband who thinks I'm CRAZY for running on some of the days I do...like mid snowmageddon.......................) Think of something you LOVE...something that relaxes you and makes you a better person...like drinking wine.....what if your wine bottle was right outside of your window....and Mother Nature dumped snow and ice all over it....so you can still see that beautiful little bottle but can't get to it. Some days you can chip away at the snow and ice enough to get a straw in the top of the bottle and take a little sip...but not drink the whole bottle like you want to because it's mostly frozen...so you go back in your house and stare at the frozen wine bottle for another week HOPING next time you can take a bigger drink. In the mean time your whole house is imploding on itself because you are going to LOSE IT.

ANYWAYS...I'm doing the best I can in this craptastic winter. And for those people that think I'm crazy for running in the snow and the cold....................I have a throat punch for you whenever you'd like to say to me, "WHY DO YOU RUN IN THIS WEATHER!??!?! YOU'RE CRAZY." I'll show you crazy.

So for Dana's birthday I had my parents come visit so we could go away for a night.  We spent the entire day Saturday doing absolutely whatever we wanted...We didn't have to work around naps, grumpy children, snack time, or diaper explosions. It.Was.Heaven. We are going to do more date days than date nights from now on. So we went to Marshalls which has always been one of my least favorite stores to shop at.  I HATE the disorganization. But it's Dana's FAVORITE store because he LOVES the disorganization and randomness..........................we are about as opposite as it gets..................... I knew I wanted to buy at least one pair of jeans because my jeans that I have been wearing were starting to look like hammer pants. So I sifted through the racks and found a brand of jeans I had bought last April for my sister's engagement...at that time I still didn't fit in any of my pre baby jeans and thought yoga pants weren't appropriate for the occasion..................................



Those were a size 16.

So as I'm looking through the cluster ...... of a store I found these same jeans but in a size 10. My mind says. YEAH>RIGHT. Just looking at these jeans there's just no way there going to fit. So I grabbed a 12 and 14 in the same style because those were much more likely to at least zip right?!

So I get to the dressing room and am staring at the 3 pairs of jeans.  Which do I try on first? Big to small? Small to big? Right in the middle? Then I said to myself....Holy shit Sarah......You've worked your ass off......try on the freaking 10's.

On they went.

Up they zipped.

And I cried.

And took a picture of course.



A FREAKING SIZE 10!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

6 sizes smaller than the last time I bought that exact same style and brand of jeans.

That is why I run in snowmageddon. That is why I run when it's below zero.

This winter has been HARD....physically and mentally HARD.

I really don't care if I lose more weight or not.  What I've learned is I'm not running to lose weight. I'm running because it makes me better on the inside.

Now to be clear......my jean size doesn't make me better because I'm a size 10 rather than a 16...it's a bonus. It's been very hard to break out of the "I want to wear a size 6" or "140 pounds would be PERFECT" mentality.  I am not running to be a size 6 or weight 140 pounds...I'm running because it makes me happy. The weight loss and smaller jean sizes are just a bonus....a side effect of changing my life.  And numbers like jean sizes and pounds are ways I measure HOW my body has changed BUT NOT MY SUCCESS.

People have started to say things to me like....."You don't want to lose anymore weight do you?" or "This is as small as you want to be right?"

My answer is: I don't really care...

My goals ARE NOT ABOUT NUMBERS ON A SCALE OR A SIZE OF PANTS.

My goals revolve around running...my mental toughness...not letting that little shitty voice in my head that says I can't take over. Being faster. Running farther.

I run to feel like this.

If I lose more weight or more pants sizes great. If not...great. 

So if you're reading this thinking....Well she said before pants sizes don't matter and weight doesn't matter............................It doesn't. But it is what happens when you start investing in yourself.  And it's most definitely something to celebrate.

Until you spend hours in a dressing room trying on jeans just to walk out empty handed with tears streaming down your face because the largest size the store carries doesn't even come close to going over your hips... And a year later buy the first 2 pairs you put on......................Don't judge.

This week we will be in our 3rd "Polar Vortex" of the year. And I'm going to run more than 12 miles this week for the first time since December. Bring it winter.

Left: February 2014

Right: April 2013

Just. Keep. Going.

I HAVE CABIN FEVER!!!!!!!!!

I haven't been very consistent with my blogging lately...though if you want to follow more closely I post A LOT on Instagram (sandrewsabc).

There's no better way to put it than this winter sucks ass. We've gotten 3 times the amount of snow we usually do. We have had 2 solid weeks of Polar Vortex Hell with wind chills in the -20's and -30's. Last week the snow covered sidewalks started to melt then one of the snow storms turned to rain and left a solid inch of ice EVERYWHERE.

Not to mention the ASS HATS that don't shovel their sidewalks. Ever.

So running has been scarce. And I can see it in my attitude, lack of patience, and desire to punch an unusual number of people in the throat. I've done the best I can and gone out whenever humanly possible.

This was after 4 miles in a ridiculous snow fall. It was not snowing when I started and 45 minutes later we had 2 inches. But  I did it. 

The hubs and I spent our date night rebuilding our superhero snowmen. We've had A LOT of people stop by and take pictures...And our kids love them. We mixed food coloring and water in spray bottles to do the color. The black is spray paint because we have a TON of black spray paint left over from a pintrest project gone wrong...........................................................

Building snowmen is a GOOD workout! That snow was HEAVY! I also have taken up shoveling....Desperate times people.............desperate times.......................................................

So if you live by me and see me shoveling and Dana is inside it's MY CHOICE!!!!! And it's considerably quieter outside.

The boys have been helping me kick my cabin fever too...Tyler loves to help when I'm doing the ab challenge of DOOM. A group I'm part of started an ab challenge on January 1st that worked our upper abs REAL good. This month we switched to lower abs....HELLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOO. 

Here's the challenge:

10 V-Ups

25 Flutter kicks

25 6 inch leg lifts (so only lifting your legs the bottom 6 inches and NO touching the ground

20 bicycle crunches

10 back extentions

15 push ups

Repeat 3 times. 4 if I'm feeling beastly. 

OUCH. I've modified it a little because there was another set I was doing that hurt my lower back so I switched it with flutter kicks. Anyway you cut it it hurts. 

Zack likes to help with squats. This was on one of the 6 snow days we had in January..................................................................................

And the Max Man LOVES being outside. So we shovel together...Meaning I shovel....he waddles around for an hour and then takes a killer nap. 

I'm seriously considering joining a fitness center that has childcare for the next 2 months because I HATE THIS WINTER. But if it's snowing for days on end it's not like I can drive to get there. However, the ice that is EVERYWHERE is not going anywhere untill we get a good thaw..............................2 months from now. UGH.......I just have to kick the mommy guilt of
1. Putting my kids in a childcare place 2 or 3 days/week
2. Spending money solely to benefit myself. I'm a huge supporter of happy wife, happy life, but GAHHH... I just don't know. Maybe I'll just employ a flame thrower to run ahead of me.

And how about a little Wednesday motivation for you.................

When I was pregnant with Tyler I was a mess. I honestly don't remember a lot about the last 4 months of that pregnancy...I  don't remember Max's first steps. Talk about Mommy Guilt. I would never have thought one short year later I would be in the best shape of my life. I thought it was going to take YEARS to fix what I incubating 3 kids in 4 years and eating ALL THE FOODS had done not just to my body but my mind. 

1 year. 1 little year.

Just.Keep.Going.

Happy 1st Birthday Ty Ty.

To My Sweet Baby Ty Ty,

Happy Happy Happy 1st Birthday! This has been the fastest, crazies, most exhausting, and most rewarding year of my life.

One year ago tomorrow you were born in the comfort of our home in a room full of strength and love.  When you were put in my arms you were so quiet.  It took you a minute to let out your first cry and even that didn't last more than a few seconds.  You snuggled into me and just looked around at the big, cold, bright, new place and fell asleep.  Those first few minutes of your life sum up your personality to a T. You were the hardest baby to grow but have been the easiest, sweetest, snuggliest, little man since you took your first breath.  You've sat through volleyball practices, t-ball games, and long runs with me without a peep. You could live your life being carried around all day and be perfectly happy.

It's no secret that you were a HUGE surprise in our life...But EVERY day I am thankful God blessed us with you. I'm thankful for you snuggliness...your infectionous belly laugh...your sweet, sweet personality...the way you just go with the flow of our crazy life...but most of all I'm thankful for how having you made me realize that my life was missing something I didn't even know I needed.

 

In the last few weeks you've started to find your voice in our house and learned that to be heard above your crazy brothers you need to be LOUD.   You're also not afraid to join in their antics without a second thought...climbing, wrestling, and always trying to keep up.  Raising you and your brothers is no joke. You are a busy bunch....But what makes it all so much easier is how each of you love your mama oh so much...And what I want you to know not just today but every day...is that I love you more than you will ever know...at least not until you have your own babies and watch your heart walk around outside of your body every.single.day.

Happy Birthday Baby Ty Ty. You will forever be my favorite surprise of a lifetime.

Love, Your Mama.